Scientists: Stem Cells Can Fix Your Broken Wang
Stems cell research has been quite a divisive issue in recent years.
There are some people don’t want scientists to get their magical stem cells from discarded human embryos. Then there are other people who say, well, those embryos are just going to sit there getting freezer burn anyway, so why not put them to some good use.
Of course, there are others still who, if asked for their position on stem cell research, would say “stem what now?”
But whatever side of the debate you happen to take, I think we can all agree that we should figure out some way to get human stem cells.
Why? Because some scientists are now claiming that they believe stem cells can help fix broken or injured penises. And this, obviously, would be the greatest application of stem cell medical technology the world has ever seen.
Yes, greater than curing the blind, or reversing Alzheimers. I mean, we’re talking about repairing broken wangs, here. What could be more important than that?
Researchers led by Dr. Wayne Hellstrom at Tulane University recently used stem cells to repair a bunch of rat penises. And if you ignore the fact that the study first involved breaking a bunch of rat penises, which is messed up, you’ll find the results to be pretty amazing.
You see, on one set of broken rat penises, researchers placed skin grafts made from rat stem cells. On another set, they placed skin grafts from regular rat cells. On another set, they performed a so-called “sham” surgery that did nothing. And on the fourth and final set, they did nothing at all.
In the end, they found that the rats penises that received the stem cell grafts had a significantly higher rate of repair than the rat penises that received regular skin grafts.
Researchers say the next step will be to test the procedure on primates (hopefully they can find some monkeys whose penises are already broken) and then, if that goes well, on humans (ditto what I just said about the monkeys).
So everybody stop arguing about how we get stem cells. Figure out a way to produce them that makes everybody happy, and let’s get on with the penis-fixing research already.
[via Huffington Post]
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